Is it bad that everytime I read or hear "Woo Hoo" I immediately think of sex because of The Sims?
i am not listening to taylor swift on a pink ipod. totally not happening.
You should have been there to see the look on her face when I told her that my dog gives better head than her. It was a beautiful symphony of shock, anger, and disbelief.
At a pool hall. Dudes walkin around with fuzzy handcuffs cuffed to his belt. The douche bag level grows higher still
She even gives head with a lisp.
there are people swimming in the fountain next to the library... hello senior week
WHITE RUSSIAN WEDNESDAY. TELL YOUR CO WORKERS. INVITE QND PREPARE
At least in the future when we're all real people we can laugh about the time we all had scabies together?
This strange Italian man told me he wants to take me for ice cream and kept calling me "tomato" from tinder
he gave me a flinstones gummy vitamin and was like, "ya know.. because of ebola."
I walked in and found you petting your fish outside the bowl, you said its fine, you do this all the Time.
I don't know what that means. Any of it. BUT I will be at your house at 10:20 and you better be ready to get high as balls.
Getting on a bus with a beer pong table. I am proof we can make this campus fun.
I need my comforter. Pls bring it to me and drape me in it like an animal pelt. Ps I'm naked.
A reply to my tweet is getting more likes than mine, the disrespect is real
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