I'm home now. bring me food and boobies
As a pleasant surprise..I woke to find a Burrito and Bottle of Gatorade .....Merry XMAS to ME
Im rethinking drunk tuesdays. Also rethinking ovaries.
remember earlier when I said I was over sex with random boys? take it back take it back take it back
Call me pathetic, but saying "tits for ireland" is working out really well on chatroulette today.
I don't even want to talk about it, I'm traumatized. Even the dog knew to take advantage of the most intoxicated girl at the party...
You handed some guy a spoon you found, he yelled SPOON GAME, and then the two of you spent the next 20 minutes throwing spoons all over the kitchen.
I JUST WATCHED PAULA DEEN PUT BUTTER IN HER BLOODY MARY. This is not a drill. Real life.
Thank you for the legal advice. I hope I can pay you in blow jobs.
I woke to him laying in the floor puking in a shoe. So I guess we had a good night.
I'm eating taquitos in the bathtub at 5:30 am. What a great end to the night
Woke up at noon, still drunk, naked, with another girl next to me. When she wakes up, I'm gonna have my SECOND lesbian experience with her. How's your 2015 going?
THEY DIDN'T THROW MY PORN AWAY!!!!
I can't tell if my roommate is crying or having sex and the fact that there's anime in the background is only making this more confusing
Details are irrelevant. Come bail me out of jail.
Randomize
