question. what would be the least awkward way to ask your one night stand if he came inside of you because you would really prefer not to have his illegitimate lovechild. hypothetically.
i hooked up with a boy reading dear john, i have to get points for that somewhere
no he gets major points for having a girl hookup with him after reading dear john
Hey man, sorry I chased you around the house with a small table.
Our halfway to Halloween party needs to never happen again. There were waaayy too many wasted cartoon characters passed out in my living room this morning...
hey dude come in here and see how much of my beard i can put in my mouth!
And theres a reasonable expectation that if you're fighting over a pair of yoga pants on the ground at VS someones gonna videotape it
The chlamydia really affected his face.
How exactly do I approach the whole "Well that was fun. Am I purchasing the Plan B or you?" topic?
How much morphine is too much? Keep in mind that I'm going to my graduation dinner with my parents.
i have a queen bed, a cherrywood bed frame, and gold sheets. how are you saying no to me right now?
He's in a nude suit, bald, with a pink headband and a black sharpie streak down his forehead.
We were Chugging coronas for the soul purpose of launching limes out of the 3rd story window, I'd say it was a good weekend
Well at least I still have a burrito in my pocket.
I noticed it at one point and thought do I really wanna bang the guy with the phone holster .....of course I do
Remember, I smoked so you wouldn't have to. I'm like the Jesus of Marijuana.
Randomize
