Skanksgiving break is awesome already... pilgrim and indian roleplay tonight.
Even though ive seen her get fisted by another girl at a party, shes still a doctor.
I don't know if you remember, but I was only wearing an afghan.
Our new roommate is sitting in the living room wearing a snuggie and clutching a handle of burnett's mixed with what appears to be crystal light and sobbing over a documentary about a dead race horse.
I know. Isn't she utterly fantastic?
You rang?
Saw a ginger and the first thing I thought of doing was yelling "you have no soul!" so I called you so we can yell it together with you on speakerphone.
Please God, is a penis possibly making it to vagina town to much to ask for tonight.
He's going to be my graduation present to myself.
There's scrapes on the inside of both my thighs.. Because we wanted to get drunk and climb trees naked.
Did you drink ALL that 151??
No. We drank all the jaeger... Then used the 151 to start the fire. We're also out of paper towels... And your hairspray is flammable.
Just described you as looking like "a very cute escapee from an Egyptian insane asylum"
She's relieving herself in the laundry room. I'm really hoping there's a toilet in there...
Its a holy bong. We had to bless the holy bong water.
i swear to god it was like we were fucking in 9 dimensions
I'm that daughter that had to send her mother "DON'T GET SHITFACED" & yes, in ALL CAPS.
Did I ever tell you what happened that night after he ran you over?
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