Some guy with no shirt on and his pants undone informed us he was kicked out of the cab
I asked him why, and he had absolutely no idea.
How dare you send me a picture after midnight that isn't porn. You know the rules.
Worst relationship ever. Keep in mind I've dated two married chicks and a Mormon.
I don't go on dates. I watch tv and play with dicks. dinner is a situation.
It's like you are the superhero of getting jizzed on
I always have trouble explaining my life decisions to people over the age of 30.
Her hair goes down to her lower back and nobody was there to held it back for her. She looked like chewbacca dipped in vomit.
Just got attacked by a family of raccoons, I have the worst luck.
Hate to say it and even though I definitely have a biased opinion but I'm surprised your not, sleeping with anyone else. Good personality, charisma and amazing in the sack.
Feel free to use me as a reference.
Can we talk about how i am holding a tupperware container of my own puke in the back of my grandparents car while my sister drives
last night i reached the point where my boob implants paid for themselves in free drinks. to celebrate lets go out and get more free drinks tonite.
You mistakenly try to piss in a cactus bush ONE TIME and are forever dubbed cactus ass
I came over to get dick...not to watch you vacuum....at 2 AM
I think I was judged by a squirrel this morning during the walk...
I slept with six men with different nationalities this week. Who says I'm not a woman of culture?
Randomize