He lets me throw up in him even if i do it mistakeily- erica talking about the toilet
I understand why you refuse to be sober now
My brain is officially off for summer until late august. If that guy wants to fuck me, he better do it soon.
i think i scared a bird with my dick
Because when I say 'You shouldn't drink anymore', she hears, 'I personally challenge you to chug 3 more mixed drinks'
Did I crawl through the hotel lobby all the way to our room?
I just ditched my friends to hang out with the chilis restaurant crew...one of these girls better have daddy issues
Some girl, somewhere, is going to wake up with my face paint on her vagina
She was mad I came so fast. I was like, It's the Olympics! Fastest time wins! We can train you in the offseason.
Go for it! You're young. Have fun. Be somebody's expensive hobby like Anastasia Steele.
I got about 15 snapchats from you with your hand saying "you want cheese sticks" or something like that and one of some weird looking weed
I found a Trump-humping republican virgin born on the goddamn Fourth of July. I NEED to hate-fuck him.
I made out with a guy dressed as the pdx airport carpet.
Portlandia didn't prepare you for that?
We will discuss everything tomorrow i presume. Including the sweaty naked tango.
You're like a care bear with a big cock & a sexual prowess that would put the mighty Thor to shame.
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