I puked while I was brushing my teeth this morning and had to get a new tbrush
Ew, did you brush them again?
Yeah but i puked on the new one and decided to give up...failure
you're putting all your eggs in a very hungover basket
Ya. I was the definition of a shit show. I woke up outside my door when my alarm went off
Second night spent with creepy guy. I either need to change his nickname or stop doing this.
DO NOT EAT ONE OF DONOVANS WEED RICE CRISPIES. I REPEAT DO NOT EAT IF YOU VALUE YOUR EYE BALLS
he knocked a glass of water onto my bed and then said that he should get to sleep on the dry side because he was "a guest"
Here's the thing, you got road head in two different cars tonight. You feel lucky yet?
He broke into my house just to tell me the door was locked.
Figured out how I got so much alcohol in my hair: tried to drink my drink using my cleavage as a cup holder. Missed my drink hole and got it all in my hair
You were sending me snapchats from a bathtub with your beer helmet on and your boobs out.
painting my nails while super high-drunk. Ended up painting my entire hands. Both.
Sweet! It'll be a "that-minor-I-used-to-serve-alcohol-to-is-no-longer-a-minor" party!!!
What a better way to celebrate that I'm single by becoming a stripper and making $1000 in one night
I don't trust my subconscious. It sleeps with my exboyfriend sometimes.
How do you feel about a threesome?
Will you be there?
I'm the one asking!
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