five shots of tequila, anal and 3 cigarettes. not my best idea on a saturday afternoon.
apparently i peed in my fridge last night because my vegetable drawer was filled with it.
I guess she didn't feel like it. There was hair all over it and everything
i got us presents. or arrested. we shall see!
She stuck a Big Gulp bend-y straw up his ass to see if he could handle anal.
Ew, and?!
Well he couldn't and the deal was he had to drink something using it afterwards.
My vagina is scared and excited at the same time. It might not be able to sleep tonight.
Just did a line with lance bass. Only in NY
These days, you and me are swimming in dicks.
Marco
Polo
Someone posted a printout of my tits on my door this morning! Where did they get this photo!?!
I just sold my hat for three car bombs. I call that a win.
Where's Taylor bro?
Never mind found him under the sink
Sorry about waking up naked in your bed this morning.
Don't masturbate while listening to Pandora. Just came during a buffalo wild wings commercial and I feel really weird about it.
After last night I never want to be in the back of a cop car again. No leg room.
You’ll lick BBQ off my cock but no ketchup on a hotdog?
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