Do you ever think God made girls unattractive around their periods as a warning?
I even made an effort to dress like a conservative young lady who doesnt black out and throw up in her bed regularly today.
The pride tent is doing free lube tastings. There is also a mechanical bull.
he was wearing ninja turtle pajamas and he STILL got laid. who the fuck is this guy?!
Im also drinking whiskey while on a treadmill wearing high heels so let's consider that for a moment.
I know. I know. The man who pulled me from my mother's womb was the same man who had his fingers in my vagina today. My life is a joke. I don't know how to feel about this.
I haven't even had my coffee yet and you're being slutastic
I've finally given up enough on finals week to wear the same shirt three days in a row, because I didn't take my hoodie off for the first two.
MY DAD KEEPS LIKING PORN LINKS/ALBUMS ON FACEBOOK AND THEY ALL SHOW UP IN MY NEWSFEED
HELL YEAH TIME TO KICK THE CHILDREN
This guy knew what he was doing. Most guys can't find the spot even if it shot off a flare and played a kazoo.
How high?! We watched paid programming for 45 minutes before we realized it wasn't just a long commercial. So pretty high. The Bionic fish finder looks promising, though.
Lets get a boat first.
Tomorrow I'm going to tape my thumbs to my palms and my biceps to my abdomen to learn what it's like to be a t-rex for a day. Anyone else in?
Good news!! I can adult!! 😂 turning down the strip club on a weeknight has become my crowning achievement ðŸ˜ðŸ˜‚
I love you man I just want to hold you and fuck you until you only know my name
I don't know who you are but HOW THE FUCK DID YOU GET MY NUMBER
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