Hey kate, how is it?
sloppy...it's emily. kate just tried to do a keg stand. they dropped her. we're leaving.
Is it weird that I have contacts who i've classified as DO NOT ANSWER?
Lol no its called college
i wanted to tell my neighbors to shut up it was 4am, but listening to her rag on him for his minute man routine was actually entertaining
i guess this means i'm going to be wearing knee socks during sex again
every single kid we've ever known, every single person we've gotten blow jobs from, every single person we've hit home runs with... is at dennys right now
The freshman sure do fuck up the whataburger line at 2am
we went from five shot glasses to three in one night. we lost 'badass' and gumbi, but the ninja turtle survived. courtney says to avoid any more casualties we're not allowed to use shot glasses past 1am. and we're not allowed to throw them
Walking into the first day of college is like walking into a meat market. A meat market of sex.
she just called me the flavor packet to her ramen noodles. get me the fuck out of here.
This is that think about life weed. Thank god I'm in American lit this semester. I can actually write papers in this vat of introspective stoned.
Drank for free all night and I'm not even sleeping w the bartender. What is this magic?
And then the templeton police were like "oh I remember her, yeah the blue haired girl that we picked up cause she was passed out drunk on the side of the road"
BRING THE BAGELS
Remember the girl I had sex with in the dorm stairwell? She got married!
If he sends me a dick pic so help me god.
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