If your still trying to figure out the moment I stopped caring; it was the point in which you said "I really wasn't sure whose baby it was"
I think I pulled my groin stumbling back from the bar. That or the hippo I woke up next to.
thanks for the bloody nose. you probably dont remember, i'm not mad.. only because your boobs are to blame
A gentleman never tells..... therefore i will neither confirm nor deny the attatched photos
She's crying about either her ex boyfriend, her one night stand, or her own puke. None of those is worth the tears.
who started the 'put a scrunchy' around his balls' game?
There's a bus with a band full of dancing women in bras. I think I like it here.
Ahh, 151. Think of it this way: it took one shot to get you buzzed, I took eight. I may or may not have broken a tv with my skull that night and met someone's parents naked and hungover the next morning.
see that vagina ? that vagina means business
I just woke up on the living room floor at my parents house. The last thing I remember was making a scene at Buffalo Wild Wings because our waitress "Sent the game into overtime" with a 0-0 score
Is it bad that I have more guilt over drunk eating Doritos than hooking up with my ex's best friend last night?
Tell me why I woke up outside of our hotel room Wearing a cowboy hat and boots in Las Vegas.
He is getting no nudes from me. I don't even care if I'm losing his legal advice.
Bro.. I am absolutely going to have sex with our old middle school health teacher
I'm gonna cum garlic butter
Randomize
