Let me rephrase. Would it display my intentions too much if i walked all the way across my office and into the bathroom carrying my book
Anyway, my grandfather thinks you're attractive
i've never seen someone fall down the steps so gracefully... i think im in love
the cop then proceeds to point out the "proud parent of a dare graduate" bumper sticker and say well i guess it's time to take that off
I woke up locked in the bar...this has redefined partying.
Take advantage man but know that every anal bead u drop inside her will make her love u 2% more. It's science
WHY ARE YOU SMOKING WEED WHEN YOU JUST HAD A STROKE. AND MORE IMPORTANTLY WHY ARE YOU DOING IT WITHOUT ME.
Next time we smoke don't let me talk. I just said something and it sounded like I was speaking in hashtag.
And then he said "if you were planning on bird feeding me that's not ok"
smoked four grams out of a bong with a mixture of pool water and white rum. I applaud you for leaving before losing too many brain cells.
I also love my swipe to text changed a singular vagina to a plural vaginas. like my phone somehow knows I secretly want 2 vaginas
Mark my words I will never date another cop again. I don't care if he's JESUS.
So this is how i'm celebrating Easter? By eating chicken nuggets and masturbating all day. What a life.
i left you alone for two hours TWO HOURS & when i got back i had to rush you to the hospital because you were covered in Smooth Away pads & drinking the bong water..
she squeaked mid orgaism. I laughed she cried
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