So I pulled my t-shirt down, pushed my boobs up and marched right into that church!
i've come to the conclusion that there is no classy way to apply chloroseptic spray to your butthole.
On my way, I hope you have alcohol for me to blame stuff on...
HAH. HARRY POTTER CASUAL CONVO HAS BEEN EXTENDED TO DISCUSSING WEATHER. SO PRO
im at a party in sweatpants, slippers, and a basketball jersey from the eighth grade, 10 bucks says im still getting laid
I just was on a 20min team conference call where I didn't speak, I used a Gus Johnson soundboard online to answer questions asked to me...the highlight of 2010
I'm sitting in the middle of them on his bed, forcing them to watch Brokeback Mountain. I am the best cock blocker ever.
Freshman Move In Day, its like Christmas in August.
Dude, how the hell did you become an RA?
HURRY. I NEED DRUNK. MORE DRUNK.
Do you think you could handle being our babysitter if we roofied ourselves for fun??
I almost died in that meeting. Nearly dried up and blew away in the pure powder form of boredom
I know that feel bro
He's talking about me being Slave Princess Leia and how he'll chain me up. I don't have the heart to point out that he would be Jabba in that scenario...Is it bad that his lack of SW knowledge is destroying my lady boner?
He caught a cramp during sex and I was like "do you want me to get you a banana?" And he responded with "I'll give you a banana" and kept going. I'm marrying him.
Thought the acid was fake. Then my reflection didn't move when I did in the bathroom.
You ever stub your boner? It happened to me. Just know that drugs and strip poker and a hot tub. I'll Regale you with the story over drinks later.
Randomize
