just witnessed a squirrel raping another squirrel. i couldn't look away.
Lets evaluate? U kissed one boss and lef twith another man. I cock teased the other, hardcore had a tongue jammed down my throat, made out w aa third then left in a cab w alex w them all yelling at me and offering rides. My cheek was also licked and bitten by 2 other men and we almost made out (u and me) because they asked. were hired.
this kid down the hall keeps banging on his drums...i feel like i'm living in jumanji
can we please take bets on how much therapy you'll need in the future?
He' s half Black and half Italian, I finally asked...this penis maybe one for the records.
She is chewing on staples and spitting them at her cat, I think it's time to leave..
she gave me a blowjob during our lunchbreak and expected me not to tell people
We were thinking he might be gay. Like how the fuck do you not even make out with a girl that made you a grilled cheese
you stumbled up the stairs in your heels, pulled 23 one-dollar bills out of your bra and then went and puked in the toilet. didnt say a single thing to me the whole time
Just remembered I railed lines while holding a puppy
There's nothing more awkward than going on a beer run with 3 ten year olds....teacher of the year right here!
He's only giving you free adderall so you can focus on his dick.
Why is there a horse in the backyard?
I stayed at my gfs last night. This is all on you.
i got drunk and started dancing with the plant because you were out of town
i only got to wear my halloween costume for an half hour before it got taken off.
Randomize
