never have i ever had a craving for dick this badly
i don't even want to say how many boners i've caused this week
just saw 2 fat kids fight for the last slice of pizza. Litteraly fight. God Bless America
You know there's only so much I can do with a great personality.
You really need to tell him that he has a girlfriend. I'm not sure he knows
rethinking that breast reduction surgery... i'm tired of drunkenly explaining the scars to guys who don't really give a shit
He's in bed with me right now. I'm wearing a towel and all I could wish for is my freedom. And pizza.
Just watched a drug bust from the Ralphs parking lot while listening to Frank Sinatra. Happy Valentine's Day.
I want to bury your face in my vagina. Possibly by force. I will try not to suffocate you though.
Probably shouldn't have worn my jeans covered in blood from last night to class.
The liquor store was handing out free shots of some new expensive vodka, but they caught on the fourth time we came back in different outfits. Politics.
I might have to break the "you stay out of my sister and ill stay out of yours" pact that i have with tim
There's a website where you can order a pile of horse shit to be dropped on a persons doorstep. So that's another option.
I'm told I threw my cigarettes at the TV one by one Shouting about the cast of Community.
The fact that he offered to stop once he stuck it in my ass was sadly the most considerate thing anybody's ever done for me.
Randomize
