Apparently when you order 'bottomless fries' at red robin that doesnt mean you can go around to every table and eat all the fries you want off other peoples plates.
we sang "a whole new world" together. either he's my gay best friend or the love of my life.
I love how my brain works. It's like being on drugs without the costly upkeep.
To make up for the snow days we missed he's making us write a paper on alcoholism. It's like he knows.
I created a new solo drinking game. You need a handle, a laptop, and a shitty internet connection. Start watching the fort video in the que, play the snake while the videos constantly load, and take a drink everytime you fuck up. There was a video of a an asain female Justin beiber impersonator full screen when I woke up.
Why on earth is he slamming his body into the wall again?
Hostess is going out of business we'll never survive the apocalypse
I'm surprised I don't have a permanent face imprint between my boobs.
During sex his mom asks from the other side of the door, "Do you like avocados?" Who doesn't like avocados?
Have you considered sword swallowing? Something about that bj tells me you could make a it a career.
It's like everybody loves Raymond but the total opposite and everyone wants him to die
What the hell happened to the sandwich meat I just bought?
After you smoked, you made 8 ham sandwiches.
Guess that explains the mysterious disappearance of the bread...
i dont believe you. i want proof. if you end up at a hospital send me a pic.
I may or may not be drinking in a church parking lot.
It's like a donut of clothes around a pair of heels. Like they were transported to another dimension naked.
Randomize
