spell your last name, im trying to find you on facebook
I'm pretty sure this isn't my phone, but I do like these nude pics
the tile , carpet , walls , cabinets , even the ceiling ... there is Jello everywhere
it was your idea to have indoor Jello wrestling man
The fact that I pulled something plastic out of my mouth after taking that shot is starting to concern me.
She is ok w me having sex for money. Just gotta find rich grandmas.
You know i'm the father figure
Yeah the father who ate her out with me last night. Great dad
I had a girl last night tell me that she was happy to find a condom wrapper in my garbage because,and I quote, "well at least you're not raw dogging every slore that crosses your path"
You stole my crutches last night at the bar, the DJ had to ask for them to be returned
C'mon pople!!! THursday afternoon isnot gonna drinkin itself!!!
CSI Miami is on and the guy is trying to save this woman who got shot. By stripping off his shirt & belt. THE WOMAN NEEDS YOUR PANTS OFF TOO
Well I can't be held accountable to know every which time you slid a finger here or slid a finger there. I'm way too busy getting close to climaxing to document these things.
Why was I drunk tweeting incorrect Beyonce lyrics last night?
GUESS WHOSE BEST FRIEND IS OUT OF PRISON!
My cat just tried to lay on my stomach while I was masturbating. And I let her because I am so starved for affection.
Can't believe we're making vacation plans with the guy we had a threesome with
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