Not good, Ive never been this late. We need to talk.
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My poor mother should have just stuffed me back up her vagina when she had the chance.
are you drunk enough to hook up with me yet?
Sometimes you just need a break, and sometimes you also need to get stoned on these breaks. I sound like some kind of fucked up mr rogers when I say shit like that.
We officially wrote our house rules 1. We do not waste alcohol 2. Pinky promises mean something 3. Don't leave your facebook open, and if you do, don't complain 4. Never refuse cuddle or catch phrase
I mean two cocks this time. Trust me, I'm not gonna pull the same stunts as last time in this situation
Is it bad if one of my goals right now is to snort blow through a licorice?
Don't answer that. It is bad.
Why would you hook up with someone whos known for peeibg in someones mouth
Lmfao. We asked what you wanted to eat and you said vagina. I don't care what kind. Fresh, barbecue, roasted on a camp fire. I just want it on my taste buds.
she and her cat are both sick as fuck so they just sat there looking at each other with her nose dripping on the cat's. both out of fucks
She left you responsible for her guinea pig for what, 3 hours? And it somehow died under your care? I will no longer trust you with so much as a beer.
I'm playing trivia and drinking margaritas so now is not a good time.
Also lets pinky promise right now that we will NOT play "Pony" outside of each other's rooms if we have a hook up over
woke up to my little sister's best-friend's boyfriend in my bed, but how's your saturday going?
On a scale of 1 to i should hide, how deep did i dig my grave?
Randomize
