it cannot be done, he is unbreakable.
What?
..he cannot be seduced..she had to have roofied him.
Details.
Can I use cash for clunkers to trade in her boobs for a new set of 18 year old tits?
Its worth a shot.
He has jerked off in so many socks I am surprised he doesn't have athletes dick
she just refered to her hymen as "the mrs"
You are the only one who would stop a bum, tell him to open up, then pour straight vodka in his mouth. You made his year.
Ha ha. You should see the things I'm doing to my body at Bob Evans.
Is percocet and coffee considered a balanced breakfast?
im tired of her bring homeless men home when shes drunk. THEY ARE NOT FUCKING PETS!!!!
We're discussing which museums we should go to when we shroom. How ill would Picasso be?
All I could think when I saw it was, "All right, Vagina, only one of us is getting out of this alive."
Also can you rate on a scale of zero to jesus restraining order christ how creepy it is that he found a porn star that looks like me and has watched all the porn that she's been in
My gynaecologist hit my g-spot today by accident and for some reason I went "at least someone found it" VERY AWKWARD
I'm cleaning my apartment while naked. Anyone who says that's not why they want to live on their own is lying.
I got dropped off at my house at like 1030. Woke up hugging a street cat I've never seen before. Ended up drinking 260 oz of beer. 65 types. Then went out after blehhhhhh
You woke up at like 4 in the morning fell off your bunk bead, yelled at Nic for asking if you were ok, walked to the kitchen, pissed on the keg, and then looked at me and said "Still not worth it" then went back to bed.
Randomize
