This girl is very crazy
She's one of those compassionate ppl
So everything I said on this seemingly endless date offended her
Have you learned any life lessons?
I like big butts and I cannot lie.
I just got stood up by an 18 yr old. fmylife.
i just uploaded three hundred pictures and you had your shirt off in two hundred and ninety of them
the remaining ten - you weren't in
Ever since I discovered that youporn works on blackberry, my brickbreaker skills have gone to shit
Things got a little weird when he fired up his homemade flamethrower in the living room.
It got kind of awkward when her dad brought home a 20 something asian girl at 3am
Emily is drunk. We're coming to see you at work and we're bringing jello shots for you.
I can't wait for the 4th. I'll probably get drunk and end up puking all over whichever 18 year old I end up making out with.
She had forties taped to her hands and was trying to give him a hand job while he was passed out, with everyone in the living room.
pretty sure I just got a "sorry I have a new boyfriend" blow job. Confused, but totally ok with it.
Why am I the only one golf clapping for the vomiting girl on the train who just fell of her seat into her own vomit
Yeah, I'm just gonna try to repress that and remember him for his big dick and perfect jawline.
Just realized tomorrow is the anniversary of the time Dean and I glued DJ's leg back together with Neosporin and an Ace bandage. I'm bringing red velvet cupcakes to the party to celebrate.
We just started our own DARE program: Drugs are really enjoyable.
Randomize
