ur plase or mine? lol
well if you don't learn how to spell, you may be at your place and I'll be at mine.
I'd do that. But we would need storm trooper helmets.
our landlord thinks we're weird & alcoholics. he came in to fix our broken tub and saw the laundry door on our table for beer pong, the garbage bag full of empty fifths, and that one armed baby on the doorstep. plus he saw us swimming and yargging in our pirate pool that one time.
I want you to come here and listen to her climax and then tell me how funny you think it is.
He met a random girl on the bus home and decided to go to Spain with her. The blackout decisions are becoming internationally epic. He has work in the morning.
Hypothetically speaking, what is the proper response if one gets bitten by a most likely not rabid squirrel? Hypothetically.
I dont care how high you are "yes" is not the correct response to "what do you want from Taco Bell" Mom.
I don't remember because I was drunk out of my mind, but I have it on good authority that weed cinnamon buns at 3 in the morning with chocolate milk are better than sex.
If those antibiotics mean you can't drink, ya might as well pack your bags and re-enroll next fall, because sobriety this week would be social suicide.
He was just lying on the living room floor watching Star Wars with six empty pack of cigarettes and two empty cases of beer.
In his defence I guess I did take the bed, couch and dining room set in the breakup.
cops woke me up on the sidewalk and asked where my shoes are.. fuck if i know, im sleeping on the sidewalk! actually i didnt say that, i just cried until they gave me a ride home.
Also, I found your gauge.
I found it under my pillow like a gift from the Sex Fairy.
Look, you don't know disfunction until you've sat on the john taking a shit and crying while totally sober.
With everyone putting up pictures of their moms on Facebook it's time to go single MILF hunting.
Woke up eating a pickle on the bathroom floor this morning in some random guys sweat pants.
Randomize
