The class that normally occupies the room we use for my Monday class had to do posters as if for a Hamlet movie and they pick actors for each character and this person wrote "Robert D. Niro"
Hopefully. Play it cool. Bust out a few jokes. Chew with your mouth closed and show your boobs.
we knew you were done when they played It's All Coming Back To Me Now by Celine Dion and you started crying
On the brightside though, I found the motivation to clean my shower, it was right underneath my need to masturbate in said shower.
I told her we could be friends and she said the last time i told her that we had sex behind a bar at 4am
Delete her number from his phone. He keeps slurring how he's going to get her "all sorts of pregnant".
come onnn, where's your sense of adventure?!
I left it in that guy's dorm room.
Things are burning & the world smells of peanut butter. It's beautiful.
Winning the lottery was the best thing that ever happened to my penis.
Greatest pickup line ever: "We are out celebrating winning the lottery."
Well, it's a fine line between people-watching and boob-staring. It's a gray area. But we're in Paris. Let's leave it at that.
Nothing like the judgmental looks you get in the bathroom when you still have last night's glowsticks on
You could at least care enough to fake an orgasm for me.
there's no judgement here...i was recently just fingered in my dorm hallway while having a conversation with 5 people.
They left me at home... I'm a liability
We are so disgustingly codependent and I wouldn't have it any other way
Randomize