No one goes out in public like that, unless they do anal
how do i word it so it doesnt sound like im asking him if he has ever been in jail.
And your hair- I'd make sure to pee on it first.
theres still like 7 beers in the gutter from the roof party we had last night. i dont know how we got up there. but we need to get those beers down.
That's fuckin bs. I had the bouncers beat by 30 yards til that dumbshit on the moped stopped in front of me.
Every shot buddy I have I end up blowing. I don't know whether this pattern is good or bad.
Omg, looked at my call history, and judging by the times of calls it took me like half hour to walk home frommcds
They broke our car window and then wrote "great night" on the next
He just got dropped off drinking a flask, sitting on the handlebars of a chinese delivery man's bike
Tonight's gonna be epic. Did he bring my noodles?
If you two are having sex, stop. I have something really important to ask you about psychics.
Drunk and alone at a magic show is what my life has become without you
How do I go about this? "Hey, its my birthday in 40 minutes. Would you like to come over for some sex? Also, please bring snacks"?
THEYRE FUCKING GOLD
Are you talking about the color of my tits or the quality of my nudes cause both are
How much glitter would I have to ingest in order for a "magnificent" amount to appear in my ejaculate?
Sex was followed by homemade breadsticks. I waited till after the breadsticks were gone to tell her i had a gf.
Randomize
