What kind of friend are you? You don't even blackout anymore.
please explain to me why there is a shopping cart in my living room.
i fucked her mom dude
there's something to tell the kids
I just made doing the dishes into a drinking game. crafty, or pathetic?
What would you do if you came home and i was in nothing but the table cloth?
You can't be mad because the taco bell people like me and not you. I'm not the one that puked in front of them.
It was one of those "wake up holding a random metal flower" kind of nights.
You were buying shots for everyone, saying, "I got a tax refund. I'm a MILLIONAIRE."
Well u missed Autumn's newly 21 yrs old sister flashing her tits and standing on the bar last night.
you guys just sat there and simultaneously smoked bowls staring at each other... it was like a bowl off or something.
Also, just woke up in a Romney tank and sequin flag panties. Merica.
You don't know scared until you've just begun the first stage of an acid trip till a guy on stilts with a creepy mustache and beard says "enter the Forrest"
I had the bathroom of girls sing you happy birthday while you puked. I couldn't stop laughing. They were all so supportive
I was sending him tit pics while watching how to train your dragon 2. It was everything.
Considering what happened last night and how horrible I feel, I look amazing
Randomize
