it took me about 5 minutes before I knew it was in her ass. i thought the first time would be a bit more special
She got her phone back last night. And the first thing I sent her was a picture of me pooping in a culvers bathroom
The stories of what you did in Cuba got home before you.
He's engaged. If the world's smallest penis can find true love than I can too.
Its not low standards. We're more of like a self esteem camp for average girls
It's all fun and games until you throw up hot cheetos in your drawer.
can't decide if i look like a hooker or a missing member of Poison today
This is one of those times I wish I had a time machine so I could go back and punch myself in the face to make me realize what I need to do before it's too late
after you left he started opening his bottles by smashing the neck against the edge of the fireplace and pouring beer into his mouth. it was about the manliest thing ive ever seen. its probably how lumberjacks open their beers... if they didnt have their axes handy.
Spider-Man is making out with Wonder Woman while Captain Kirk feels up Princess Lea. Nice to see nerd barriers broken down at Comic Con.
Not many people can say they've been photo bombed by an antelope. I sure did.
So it turns out "let's pretend to be gay so guys will stop hitting on us" was step one in her plan to get me into bed...
It's Christmas. You could splurge on something a LITTLE fancier than wine in a box.
We were all having a bath, the three of us, then that drug dealer guy walked in and peed. Sitting down. Apparently he didn't want to offend us.
From now on I'd like to be known as Rampage.
Randomize
