sometimes when you bring the thunder you get lost in the storm
So, it's like build-a-bear for your vag?
its whatevr the fuvk you could ever want is wht it is. i dont wanna read. literacy? overated in my opinion. overated.
she was stuffing dove chocolates in my mouth while giving me a blow job. GOD I LOVE VALENTINES DAY
apparently breaking a beer bottle and then throwing up in a urinal is a terrible way to pick up girls.
Can u please come get me. My car keys are gone. Somehow I ended up sleeping in my trunk
Does it count if I'm only ambidextrous while masturbating?
she found out just an hour ago that she might have cervical cancer. either way we're watching 50/50 and taking a shot of patron anytime anyone says cancer.
I don't think boys are aware how difficult it is to take a picture of your own ass.
I hope you enjoy this collage I made of you and me getting fucked up together
She needs sedatives and a leash
well you don't shave your pubes into a handlebar mustache and keep the party to yourself
Oh my god. We just got locked out of our cabin and went to the neighbor's to see if they had a key and caught the neighbor jerking it. My night > your night
WAIT this kid is eating yogurt with a fucking ladle. what is happening?
hey can you come unlock the basement door? I'm trapped in here.
no I can't, you're a safety hazard. but, there's a beer keg down there somewhere. we don't have cups, but help yourself.
Randomize
