i swear to god, this restaurant is playing a john tesh cover of a song from aladdin
Dude it was awful. I woke up with more strippers in my dorm room than those duke lacrosse kids.
accomplished twins. life is a go
I blacked out, fell off a swingset, and thought I was Liz Lemon for almost an hour.
if you could put a roof over IU campus it would be the biggest whorehouse in the nation
This sounds like "Sober" Ericka. Sorry that message wasn't for you. I only do business with "Fell off the wagon" Ericka. Please pass that message along to her.
Hey, did you take me to hospital last night?
That would make regret #10
He was more like the original regret
I told him I'd clean his cock if he ever sent my GF another text message. It was a horrific time for me to miss the l key on my iPhone.
Best ethics paper a stoner could write. I called my professor Dr. Superfly Arandia. And I'm pretty sure I used "respect the hustle" somewhere in there too.
I sent him a tit pic with the caption, "Mt. Arie and Mt. Hola are ready for expedition." Too nerdy?
nobody put me to bed and I ended up peeing on a tree and got written up
Is there something wrong with us? Seriously.
Possibly, but I'd rather not fix it.
sex on acid sucks though, i want to connect with the universe not your dick.
Going to give your dick a friendship bracelet.
Randomize
