They have glow in the dark condoms. That's so scary.
Something like a penis light saber.
so I think I'm done having sex with her, she's way too crazy
what about the blowjobs for adderall?
no those are still okay
You told the cops that they couldn't arrest you because they weren't hot enough to fuck
on toilet. in drag. drinking coffee vodka. I regret nothing.
Just got to school and somone already mentioned the amount of cereal im carrying.
I already apologized. And I got cum in my eye in return, I say your night beats mine...
We need to go to the store an get depends. I really don't want to be bothered with the bathroom this weekend.
I do wanna see you. And we can just lay here and watch a movie and listen to me cry.
Handcuffed our DD to a naked stripper don't think he will try to sneak out
He can pick locks you know
That's the reason for the naked stripper
Flacco has been sacked like 7 times. His name also auto corrects to Flaccid. That's so sad
I literally just force feed a guy flintstone vitamins after sex
Just had to stop myself from doing a bump on the Disney bus. The struggle is real.
He just said "I know you want my cock" and I said nah. I want food bro
P.s. There are few things I love more than brand new mascara and you are one of them.
If I have put a neon “vacancy” sign on my skirt for him to get the picture I will.
Randomize
