You were right, I'm so drunk and I want to eat the shit out of my vanilla cupcake candle it smells delish
Experience is the best teacher
its not facebook stalking, its market reasearch
how much land on farmville do you have now? i sold all my shit to make room i need more money... these animals need to know I'm running a business not a charity.
The visine ive been using for four yrs expired. in sept. of 2001.....i will never question my eye problems again.
I just had a dream where Bob Saget recognized me from when I hung out with him in a dream I had months ago.
On the bright side, at least we arent the generation raised by fucked up teen moms.
He just ordered a bottle of Beam at an Italian place for us to share.
I just wanted to clarify that I am not bisexual and had no intentions of ACTUALLY penetrating my roommate with a can of bugspray.
Holy fuck, spaghetti burritos are the best idea I've ever had.
The video of him doing the dougie made me telling him I didn't want a relationship, just his virginity so much easier.
I'm surprised I didn't lose anything last night. Except maybe my dignity but other than that we gucci.
See I would make a great girlfriend. My surprises are sex and burritos. What else do guys want
Jesus Christ. How the fuck do you not tell someone that your wife can see on the phone bill who you text and how many times ?
I'll just say I told you so at your funeral
I swear I have some evil slut demon in me when I'm blacked out
Don't we all.
Randomize