Having kids is risky. They might end up weird.
halloween makes it hard to decipher real cops... from sexy men dressed up as them.
Just a heads up: The party is Fourth of July themed. Spread the word
dude its may
Work with me here, man.
Babe when I told you that you needed to grow up I didn't mean get drunk and sponsor 8 African kids.
Listen. I don't care if its "nontoxic" im not putting it in my fucking vagina.
It was my little brother's 14th birthday today. Didn't know what to get him so I just showed him how to use incognito tabs on google chrome.
I think I'll handle my grief by throwing myself headlong into lesbianism. Seems like a fitting tribute to you.
We fucked through the entire Destiny's Child album, it was a beautiful thing.
It was a book called Gay Safari.
I'm so happy for you now that you have found your perfect porn novel.
ARE YOU THINKING VAGINA THEMED RESTAURANT
I'm on the couch watching HGTV googling giant boob Halloween costumes so life is swell
You seem to be avoiding the poop question. How did you poop on your hand?
We fucked. Had a political debate. I won. So I sat on his face.
We're not ready for visitors right now.
wtf? who's we?
The Royal We: Me, My Vag, and I.
we used a blowdryer last night to warm up our left over pizza..it worked perfectly at first..but then the chili powder got into his eyes..
Randomize
