Me too ba-by. I wanna bite your ear lobes they are so fat.
youve choked your chicken with your arm asleep and acted like it was some1 else right?
So after i got done, she went over and got out her gecko, I felt like I was in an X rated geiko commercial.
Random question, how's your gag reflex these days
last night i found out that about 5 of my friends audio recorded us having sex through the bedroom door, then auto tuned it in the tpain app on his iphone.
There are babies in the room i shouldnt be high with babies in the room.
looking back, maybe 11 flaming dr peppers was a little extreme
I'm too hungover to be in a fucking cow suit right now
He kept trying to order 'sex on the tennis courts' for a drink last night
He didn't dress up but kept finding random pieces of costumes on the floor at each club. He was an 80s hair band warrior at the end of the night.
You haven't had the true md experience until you've had your crotch grabbed by a drunk stripper with a snaggle tooth in front of your coworkers.
There's holes in the drywall and the beer pong table is a broken door on two barstools. You know they like to party.
"I'm not drinking any more tonight." As I dipped my quesadilla in a shot of tequila....then eats it
Talked to the dude for a hour . I now know where he lives, his occupation, his goals, his dreams and what his dick looks like.
He had been licking my nipple for like 5 minutes and it wouldn't get hard. He asked me to lick my own and when I did, instant hardness. I realized I'd rather have sex with myself then this guy ..
Randomize
