Already tried, she's too smart for that. I need a Primos "Do your wife in the butt" lure/call to trick her into wanting it
I woke up around 30 bottles of beer, with a piece of aluminum foil in my hand, that had "you Win" Wrote in sharpie..
Just got my cast off. My occupational therapist wants me to self-gratify. My clit is about to have an awesome weekend...
My dry heaving is complicating my ability to speak.
Oh. And what's the twitter protocol for following the guy you blew behind a shed?
The port-a-pottys are knocked over so I have nowhere to sleep.
the old man that you threw the shoe at says "hi" and many rude words...
The only pictures I have are of me being stoned or me looking like a man, which do you prefer?
You can laugh all you want but 99 grapes is a lot stronger than what you were drinking.
It's hot as dicks out. Lets get drunk on the roof and make pterodactyl sounds at people.
To the point, I hope I remember where to put my dick when I finally get laid again
You have a 50 50 chance
IF YOU HAVE THE CHANCE TO HIT THAT, AND YOU DON'T, I WILL FUCKING CRUCIFY YOU.
You're such a supportive sister.
When the hubs wants to wear his training mask during sex and pretend to be Bane you just go with it.
I'm pmsing pretty hard.. .just cried 3 times while eating a Hershey bar dipped in peanut butter
But we have bathrooms and they dont
Randomize
