Who were the five players on the alien team from space jam?
Have you not heard of Jennifer's supreme lust for William Shatner? She wants to eat Taco Bell off of his love handles
just got super drunk mixing jägermeister with my lyme disease meds. even if my face goes paralyzed, at least i got smashed from it.
i like to finish this college football season knowing that not once have I had to masturbate to erin andrews
You were almost as fucked up as I was the night I hooked up with a bob saget look alike...
He got violent drunk so we have to untie him in the morning. He's in your basement and you're out of electrical tape. Don't forget because I will.
pretty sure the dicks i sucked were punishment enough
You were so drunk last night you thought you force pushed the automatic door open.
"The cab driver felt bad for us so he stopped to buy us chocolates. That counts as a valentine!"
I offered to lick your vagina while wearing a suit... Pretty sure chivalry is well alive.
Hook ups at LEGOLAND don't count right?
Are we playing inappropriate sexual encounters bingo?
Also my face is like def lowkey made of silly putty
Im gnna go loik fir my newq gay friuend now
Goodbee
He told us a story about a time his 80 year old uncle karate chopped a dick in a glory hole.
Hey man, he's too drunk to remember what you said. What drugs are we buying and when should we expect them?
Randomize
