you know you are hungover when... you set your alarm for the next time you think you are going to throw up
I too understand the importance of cheesy bread
I just gave my whole company pinkeye. How's that for a summer intern's lasting impression? BOOYAHH
do you remember wearing her cheetah rainboots and making bacon shirtless?
Nothing says true friendship like 2 people bonding over potentially having AIDS.
booty call hours are between 1:30-3:00 AM thurs-sat with the exception of major drinking holidays and election days. please try again
Were not alcoholics, were just impatient for fridays
I don't drink so I see St. Patty's as an LSD type of day. Its like a more hardcore 420
He shoved his balls through an egg carton and showed us a picture. They were surprisingly egg-like.
Just replaced the batteries in my vibrator without turning on the lights. I need to get laid.
Favor? Can you not wear as much glitter on your face this time? Walking in the house looking like a disco ball was enough embarrassment for the week 😒
I'm in that weird half-dead, half fucked-simultaneously-in-every-orifice-by-a-bus-and-it-wasn't-a-good-time state.
Not going to lie: not even the fact I'm wearing men's cargo pants can hide the fact I have an awesome ass.
Wait. We seriously played strip beer pong at the bar last night. Who said I never came up with good ideas
When I woke up today i said I will NOT sleep with her. This morning I did the walk of shame into work wearing the same clothes... How was your Monday?
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