Steel Reserve is the RC Cola of alcohol. It's never ok.
I just woke up with the words DO IT on my hand and six beers in my purse.
At McDonald's last night the guy gave you the wrong kind of McFlurry, so you screamed at him, "YOU MCFUCKED UP."
This morning I saw a frozen puddle in front of my RA's door and I laughed, assuming someone poured water in hopes that she would slip and fall. That's when my roommate told me I had peed there last night. Thank you Captain Morgan!
What's the big deal? you guys fuck
3 times is my limit. I don't even want to know you exist after 3 times
My niece just called my sister in law a teabagger. I love NPR and it's corrupting influence on small children
Woke up this morning in a randoms bed clutching an airplane ticket. God I hope I'm still in the country
We tried to line dance with everyone but it turned into drunken stumbling and attempting to grind on random frat boys. I feel that this might turn into an every Thursday thing.
We'll wreck the fuck out of my furniture. How often does one really get the chance to fuck through a table with no negative consequences?
If you're in the liquor store 5 minutes before close, and you have to ask the cashier for a coin to flip to make a life decision because "vodka takes you to a bad place," you need to reevaluate your life.
You know what would make the espn body photos even better? If anyone knew who any of those fucking athletes were. That, and maybe not feature Gary Player.
The highlight was when a stranger was nose to nose with you threatening to kick ur ass, and you said "Is that your real face? Stopped him dead.
It's entirely possible that I'm fucking yet another gay guy
I had one beer! ONE BEER! They took shots in mourning of my tolerance last night. My ability to drink is a joke.
Is Facebook telling the truth about your nipples?!
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