in the car goin home for fam dinner and he is silent... i think he realized how big of a whore his little sister is
how the hell did we fit 12 drunk lesbians in your car?! I felt like we were playing lesbian tetris last night.
you know its a sad night when you can actually see and hear sitcoms on at the bar
Just watched porn on a 60 inch plasma screen TV... So that's where the clitoris is
Your sister reminds me of me at her age. Stop her while you can.
Fuck. I'm going to pass the savings right on to the strippers. It's trickle down economics.
I have had more skin than food in my mouth the last three days
getting up at 8am to start drinking seemed like a much better idea before I had to wake up at 8am
Well, remember that night we took shrooms at graces an had to leave immediately to go home and hold each other on the futon and sob for four hours? That bad...
I just shit my pants and had a heart attack. Simultaneously. May or may not be related to this game.
You don't know how emotionally damaged I am from crashing into that park maintenance van. I'll never ride a bike because of it.
I'm sorry I told you to go fuck yourself after you said good morning to me when I was hungover.
I threw up in the shower. I cleaned it all up and there is on mess at all. This hangover has become borderline religous. Powerful and life changing.
Does having sex in an airport bathroom with a girl you just met at the bar count as the mile high club? ...no?
whatever. i just wanna get "forget my own name" wasted
no. you need to know your name so people know where to return you when you get lost.
Randomize
