If she sucks any more cock I swear she will be a spermivore
she asked me if I wanted a handjob on the haunted mansion ride at Disney. was I suposed to say no?
At Wal-Mart last night I watched two guys scramble for $4.34 to pay for a pack of ping pong balls and red solo cups. They had to put the .34 on a credit card. Winter break begins!
His fingers had 12 years of piano lessons behind them. my ex has been put to shame by a finger
The bartender laughed but the manager kicked me out when the mom conplained. There's no way my fart harmed that baby in any way
Still not exactly sure how i unbolted your toilet from the ground.
Do your friends by chance have our inflatable deer head?
Nevermind, it's in the dryer.
I have the Everlasting Gobstopper of boners right now. It's kinda like a gift from god, but I don't want to spend anymore time with this girl than I have to.
I haven't seen him since I gave him a hand job in the hospital. I like to think I contributed to his speedy recovery.
i think he spiked my sandwich with a viagra
He told her Jesus wouldnt yell curse or degrade her. He'd just simply shake his head and slap the shit out of her
he just kept texting even after we lit his shoelaces on fire. he just calmly walked into the pool... still texting.
SERIOUSLY WHY DOES EVERYONE INSIST THAT THEY NEED TO SEE MY BOOBS
Because there's a shortage of perfect breasts in this world. You should start charging for viewings.
I'm jealous that you can use my boobs as pillows & I can't.
Dont be alarmed when you come homeand see a guy handcuffed to your bed. His name is james. Ill uncuff him when I get home
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