I just stepped on my own foot and apologized to my shoe... THAT high.
Nothing like a little anal leakage to start off Sunday morning. Can't decide if that speaks well of my weekend or not...
If we get out of this alive, I'm never going to a Denny's at 3 am again.
Any day you don't mysteriously wake up in the garbage is a good day.
I still love him regardless of his misguided forays into heterosexuality
how does 'resolution to respect myself more' follow 'he fucks me really hard'?
I think I hit my head on every surface in that apartment last night
And now you understand the importance of Saturday naps.
Because you stay up all night having sex and eating sushi?
Definitely! I will do that this week. Right now, watching drag queens play with my dad's beard.
You're an independent woman who is defined by her own actions and not by whether or not you have a man. You also have great tits.
I spent two entire hours explaining to a guy why I wouldn't make out with him. How was your night?
My New Year's resolution is to chill out on the group sex. At least with my friends anyway.
hey, cheif big dick, where the fuck are my panties.
this kid sitting diagonally in front of me is searching "cheap bongs" on google. hahahhaaha. who does this kid think he is?
FINE I guess I'll just drink regular coke like a PLEBIAN.
Randomize
