You made me cry and you don't even care
My clean wipe streak was ended today by two enchiladas and a can of refried beans. dammit i should have been more cautious. thanks for all ur encouragement and support.
Thong +tight pants =hungry butt. Not a good look on big women! Walmart sucks.
i just keep taking vicodin and supergluing random shit
I think I should just go up to him and say, "before I invest time in this could I just take a look at your penis?"
Was I shouting at a fire engine last Friday?
Why did I just get a ziplock baggie labeled "2010" on it from you in the mail?
FYI...Jose likes Shamrock shakes better than Jack
Is this helping you get pumped up or am I going to have to send you more dick pics?
Delivery driver perk #327: I just paid for part of the security deposit on my new place in pizza. This oughta be a fun renting experience.
hope your day is as exciting as mine- one of our trauma patients just stole an ambulance out of our bay... WITH AN EMT STILL IN IT.
So I'm already mostly naked in a kind of bed but obviously too lazy to take my boots off. It's like January 1st is already here
YOu just turned down my vagina. Something must be wrong. Vegas changed you!
I have finally found someone I enjoy for reasons that do not necessarily include his dick
Only you would try street racing in a Volvo.
Randomize