Me. At least after what I've been through.
Saw a Delta Zeta recruitment poster today. On it, somebody added, "All you need is your daddy's credit card and a lack of self-respect."
Do I need to let your sister outside to go pee or anything before I leave?
It's never good when you wake up covered with burns
He told me his mother taught him that move. What the hell do I say to that?
RIP Summer 2010. God knows it had to be one of us..
Wait, is this the kid that tried catching a bat in your backyard with a flashlight and a ball of tin foil?
private study room at the lib turned into byob study room. that turned into battle royale and eric impaling his leg on a pen.
Just got offered to exchange moonshine for manscaping services by a gay guy. I'm gonna have the smoothest back in St. Louis county.
Plus I'm pretty sure you said "love you" on the phone, so technically I should be putting you on some type of probation
You made me pull over because you thought a leaf was a twenty rolling across the road.
Nothing like hearing "I found your pinky nail" before you even noticed it was missing.
There's glitter in my speakers, piles of cheezits on the floor, a random Audi in the driveway and a homeless dude napping in a lawn chair in the backyard. Wtf happened last night?
You were crying hysterically
So that's why my heels were in the oven...
bonus check + party bus = big hot mess
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