i was looking up hair salons in ithaca for the wedding and one is a hair salon/ sake bar! you can have sake or champagne while you get your hair done!
question, how would one sake-bomb while getting hair done without getting a horrible haircut?
It feels like he gave my taint an indian burn.
eye of the tiger was playing while i pooped... it totally helped.
I'd just like to give a shout out to jesus and plan b for making this day possible.
Some guy just delivered flowers to my roommate cause he fell off a roof onto her at a party last night. I think they have a date tomorrow.
come back what if one of your parents walks in and im just sitting here eating a cheesesteak without you
Let's go get our ovaries removed together. It'll be like bonding by getting mani/pedis, but with more vicodin and less unwanted pregnancies.
They evidently had to pull his penis out of me while we were passed out on the floor.
You carried me up the stairs after I told you not to. And what did you tell me? "Let me test my strengths."
Hahaha my philosophy professor just opened class with "I had a shitty weekend and I was at the bar until 815 this morning. So bear with me".
I've reached the gravitational age where it's very hard to get my face and my boobs in the same shot without some kind of yoga involved .
The ketchup exploded, and totally splooged his face and the wall. You could see the outline of his head in the wall splatter.
Prop 8 repealed and I FINALLY got my period. Good day for America!!!
I found him in the kitchen singing German metal into a banana while simultaneously mixing brownie batter. He didn't have any pants on.
Want to have dinner and we can talk about how my vagina can make you feel better?
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