Just heard "Kiss Me Though the Phone" for the first time. Amazed how it took Soulja Boy two songs to become a shitter version of Ja Rule.
I couldn't even finish, she was lounder and more annoying than DJ Khaled
He showed up to fuck me at the same time the pizza guy did. It was like everything I needed just showed up at my stoop.
i just spent 10 minutes talking to the lady who works at taco bell about my romantic situation.
Last I saw him was around 10 this morning. He was passed out on the porch with his head under the barbeque cover and there were cups of orange juice around him as well as loose tobacco spread everywhere. Good luck getting a hold of him.
The sign say "Kereoke" strip bar. 5 more beers and ill be ready to rumble.
Some girl just walked passed me, said "fuck yeah!" and is now crawling up the stairs
Apparently "I have the beer shits" isn't the excuse my boss wanted to hear. So sue me
HE ASKED IF I HAD SIBLINGS WHEN I ASKED HIM TO LICK MY ASSHOLE
I'm actually kinda upset that we didn't consider velcro-ing detachable capes to our clothes before this moment.
I came on her face and asked if she wanted fries with that. Currently driving to McDonald's.
You know its a good morning when you wake up with blonde hair extensions in your pocket. . .
Uhm... Found a ziploc bag... In the freezer. Sam, thought it was lemonade. Why did you make frozen piss at my house, again?
I am playing in the snow in my bunny outfit. GET OVER HERE
I was looking at your nipple and it made me think of you
Well I hope so...
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