Is it a bad that I spent my 5 year anniversary with my husband texting my ex boyfriend?
You know the gilmore girls would be alright if it was on mute the whole time
I hate that he uses me for something other than sex. What does he think I am? His girlfriend? Ha.
Life for us students isn't all fun and drunken lesbian affairs you know
Ultimate Fighter Idea. You and I both have unprotected sex with the same girl in the spam of days. Whoever the child belongs to, wins and that child is the ultimate ultimate fighter.
How high are you?
So high I started thinking my desktop picture of a cat was too erotic for the workplace.
It's snowing in May and there was a law school party at the strip club. The end is near.
No, you made a silk sheet toga and held up a dildo calling yourself "The Statue of Puberty". People made pilgrimages from the other party down the block to see you.
GOOGLE HAS JUST RELEASED AN UPDATE THAT ALLOWS YOU TO CATCH POKEMON USING MAPS. Pack your shit, our time has COME.
the moment when you open a dick pic with your mom in the car... On your moms phone... Of your dad... Scarred for life
I explained to him that me turning straight is a once a year thing. And this boy just happens to be the chosen one.
Like I blink, and he's face first in my vagina.
Let's not share with anyone else in the apartment of how we simultaneously peed in the kitchen sink last night.....
I would give away three of my own ribs to be able to eat myself out.
...ew
Listen, she cheated on him first. I've known both of them since we were 12. They have no secrets from me. And yes, as a matter of fact, I absolutely did enjoy screaming out his name into his, soon to be, ex wife's pillow.
Randomize
