he is not the type of person you only have sex with once. god adds years to your life every time you sleep with him.
When she sits down, she uses her fat rolls like an arm rest.
found a naked boy completely buried under a pile of her clothes and terrified...she says she was "saving him for later"
I'm about to enter vancouver's biggest liquor store. I feel like I should sent you a "wish you were here" postcard.
Dude, she literally stopped, mid fuck said "I want soup" got off my dick and make top ramen.
Dude. The walls are totally staring at me right now. I told you this was a bad idea.
Just used my boobs as a ramp to guide ramen into my mouth.
yeah...that's gonna come up in court
Please tell me that chemistry equipment is for chemistry and not for producing felonies.
Nothing says Happy Holidays like sending a picture of your ass to the wrong manager.
We trekked into the state forest, laid the comforter down and he proceeded to tell me that we could stay here and stargaze, turned me around and fucked me like the lion king.
Just packed a snack to eat on the way to McDonald's. That stoned.
he's been 21 for 38 minutes and he's already trying to fist fight this dude over his girl
awwwww babys first drunken mistake
he's the kind of guy you give a fake number to and he still finds out your real number anyway...
Planning a vacation around my dog. I have become one of those dog moms.
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