last night was a success...if success means i don't remember the guy's name and my panties are somewhere in the parking lot behind the bar
Do you think Patty Mayonase ever went down on Doug?
how should i go about explaining the hickey i drunkenly gave myself last night?
Did we have sex last night or did we just wake up naked covered in oil?
Not even close. I woke up in the bed of Codys truck. Wrapped up in a sleeping bed, using a stuffed alligator as a pillow. And Alex was laying naked beside me. Not to mention I wasn't wearing the clothes I got there in.
I smell like booze and the valet literally buckled me in, def top 3 walks of shame
i still can't believe we survived that barcrawl. the third bar had bullet holes and we still went in.
Yours weakened by children. Mine weakened by a forearm sized cock for 8 years.
We need to be on the same page regarding the 3some this time. No more "one of us should probably leave" moments.
My boss just high fived me after finding out i made it through lunch rush rolling on molly. To think this guy used to terify me.
80% sure the drag queens carried her home
I always can't wait to see you but when there's also an opportunity to get naked it elevates to an entirely different level
Hey when you get home, can you do me a solid and throw one of your pregnancy tests on my bed?
EPT or First Response?
It’s gonna be hard being interviewed by this girl without remembering the time she showed me her nipple piercings at Dylan’s party
Dude, running 15 min late.
Let's play a game, you pay for all the drinks I can finish before you get here. Go.
Randomize
