My penis looks like a roll of pennies
Oh. Ok. I get the hint.
Like a roll of pennies where the paper got wet & then dried all wrinkly and weird...
if she mentions anything about chili and my phone, just go with it
sperm doesn't mix with malibu too well
I don't remember. I think I elluded to the fact that I would buy him a dildo for his birthday.
Welp, she's chewing our paper towels again. She's like an obnoxiously hot puppy
That was around the time you tried to kick me out for being rude to your fish.
its not like she's the last girl on the planet with symmetrical breasts and great skin
Semen is not good for contacts.
I have acquired 14 pictures of hard dicks tonight... I was on a mission. Don't even pretend you aren't proud.
Told him I'd blow him in the bathroom. There was a giant window everyone was looking thru. He whipped it out n I burst out laughing n walked away. Even blackout drunk I set the bar high. You should be proud.
It's like if a cloud had tits and you laid on them.
10/10 would definitely still fuck you dressed as squirrel
You don't have issues. You're a consenting adult having sex at work. Go you.
You ever have a fart follow you around?
Guuuuurrrrrl! He ate the 🌮like it contained the Covid-19 vaccine!
Randomize
