Did you know Kal Penn works at the white house? That's almost white castle.
I'm going to take the bottles back.. And maybe get an x-ray
so my car got towed last night. I didnt know it cost 118 dollars to have a college experience
These guys are walking up and down the hallway yelling, "Yo, is this the floor with the unisex bathroom?"
There's a guy at this party taking all the unfinised beers and pouring them into a pitcher so he can drink them tomorrow.
They only remember me when they're drunk...I'm like a suppressed memory.
I just watched a woman break three wood planks with her boobs. I don't know how I feel about that
I may only be a second year med student but I feel very confident in calling that a micropenis.
He would only do it doggy style. The "he's probably gay" debate rages on...
He's going to regret telling me he doesn't care if i shave or not...
Joined a porch party below me by climbing out the window and jumping off the roof. Tonight will be good
I asked him why the bed was wet and got.."well there are two options... and its not you."
Would I be crazy if I drove 1,000 miles for some dick? What mile does it become ridiculous?
what food is Colorado known for?
Pot brownies.
i don't like interrupting booty calls. thats just rude.
Randomize
