He had some BAD nuttage
Nuttage?
It's like cleavage......... but different
Just got mistaken for a cardboard cutout ad in line at Taco Bell. New low?
the trash is collected at 5:50 on mondays. i was up puking all night and heard them
sorry for covering your dog in whipped cream. his bark made it sound like he wanted it.
I just won unlimited hot dogs for life. I'm so glad I smoked
So I totally just remembered that you tried to smoke a hornet out of it's nest.
I vaguely remember chanting "USA" at the pool when we were talking to the Frenchies.
We were pointing at fat people and chanting USA.
You are right. The scrape marks on her ass are from her breaking the doggy door by crawling through it.
He came into your room last night to tell me he was leaving, when I woke up this morning he was facedown in your hallway. He didn't make it very far.
100% truth: never tied someone to a bed using 4 pairs of sweatpants before
He talked to you for like two seconds while you were shit faced doing Forest Gump impressions...how is that possible?
Definitely but only if you hit on the 16 year old in the karate class as part of your waffle and gin fueled sexually deprived rage.
I'm 25 and I shit my bed last night. And I'm telling you about it. Not sure which is worse
The neighbor just yelled bring me back that big red alien penis.
The girl neighbor.
Just a typical Friday. Dinner, drinks, doing lines with a member of Congress
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