normally i'm against accepting campers on facebook but this one saw me giving head to another counselor and didn't say shit about it to my boss so i feel like shes earned the right to look at my sloppy drunk pictures
I'm driving to work with an ice pack on my vagina. how was your weekend?
watchout when you come home, dougs at the top of the stairs naked eating doritos
you threatened to puke on the table cause they didnt serve eggs Benedict
Just told him about my threesome. if that doesn't make him want to date me nothing will.
How did you get the entire couch up on it's side and into the bathroom?
What are the signs of a concussion? Please don't freak out.
Some guy is walking around the bar with his dick out. Health code violation?
I'm fucked up. I can't drink anymore. We stole a cat.
What shirt can I wear out that says 'I may have a broken arm, but it's not the one I give handjobs with'?
We ended up debating which Food Network host would do best in porn.
"DO YOU LIKE FLYING KITES" WORKED AS A PICKUP LINE. SUCK IT.
Then, she put flavored warming oil on my dick and was amazed when something she bought FROM SPENCER'S almost burned my dick off.
So many Oreos I'm regretting this decision already but I'm happy at the same time...The straddle is real
Struggle. Not straddle. I'm not straddling anyone.
I decided not to look up the nudes, because I believe that there is a line, and that mocking my old classmate's horrid nudes alone crosses that line.
Randomize
