Dude, TWO hot chicks on jeopardy tonight. gonna be a good one
Dude, I am so turned on right now. Hot chick with glasses from brooklyn is absolutely crushing right now, taking whole categories. might beat off to jeapordy...
do another line during during the commercial and make the magic happen during double jeopardy.
The Mets? Come back? That'd be like Nickelback writing a good song.
absolutely not. he will always be that kid that threw up a ham and cheese sandwich in fourth grade to me.
He was from Iceland of course I didnt sleep with him, havent you seen Mighty Ducks 2???
Turned out the thing on the lampshade was a bloodstain, not a bedbug. We feel much safer now.
i never thought i could drink so much vodka in 8 minutes
He is like a dragon that makes me want to spread my butt cheeks, so he can fill me with hot fire.
Does he cat effect his dick pics to you? Because THAT is true love
N.C. cops just used a megaphone to tell me I have a slutty outfit. My life is complete.
There is a hatefuck that has the destruction level of an atom bomb raging through my viens just aching to vaporize her.
I have managed to reach the 'after meth poster look' before lunch here...
Nearly got hit by a blue bell ice cream truck. Can I count on you to make plenty of puns like "her life was sweet, and so was her death" at my funeral if that was to happen?
Good luck getting that all cat food off in the shower dumbass
I successfully navigated a full, lengthy interaction with my dad in which he never asked me if I was freshly baked. 10 points.
I AM DRUNK AND AGGRESSIVE ABOUT CURLING!
The US is in the finals, aren't they.
Randomize
