he was dropping me off and i told him i had to go to the bathroom and i leaned into kiss him and he asked how i went to the bathroom with a tampon up there... he was amazed that their was a third hole...and wanted me to show him where it was
i just bought weed at the top of a mountain, best decision of our lives to go to school in colorado.
I've decided I'm just gonna keep drinking til the baby bump shows...
I need your advice and before you say it, no, it cannot be solved by a blow job
You clearly don't understand the power you wield with your mouth.
Do you remember anything yesterday that led to needing a cup of couscous in my closet?
Hungover snowboarding. Puked off the lift and traumatized a group lesson for kids. Crash course on adulthood.
All I need is the Internet and a place to drink.
You can drink as much as you want but it's not gunna make her forehead any smaller
I was hoping it might at least fix her teeth
You slid down the bannister into a split. Lines were crossed.
That's awesome and prob the first time you had an idea of what to do. I'm super proud of you Chelz
Its cos im stoned ! My high self is maturing
Did you really get up in the middle of a tattoo to go get Taco Bell?
I'm coming right back.
Mate, you pissed in my bed. Then told me to "Just keep swimming"
He didn't even realize I was drunk. He probably just thought I loved Torchwood so much that I no longer knew how to use my thumbs
he said didn't have much sexual experience and then proceeded to tell me he is going to make me cum harder than my vibrator could
well, that escalated quicky
I plan on getting so intoxicated, that I think it's MY own birthday
Can I play this game?
Randomize
