Did you see 7 ppl got hurt at Talladaga?
Did they get their mullets stuck in an engine?
ok shes still asleep, should i pee on her and say she did it herself? and by the time you respond to this ill probably have already made the decision
Im eating ham and mustard naked, watching south park, but its totally cool cuz the paper plate is covering my nuts
I heard from anne today. She has a broken collarbone and is knocked up. Apparently florida is awesome
Im eating the cereal I found in my pocket and drinking wine out of the bottle.
can you look at this picture and tell me if you think this my kid?
Tonight just try not to threaten to pee on the hot guys buying us drinks....please..
He professed his love for me while I danced on a picnic table with a bottle of Absolut. I said thank you and walked away.
The packers need to win more often, Andrew keeps drunk calling me and confessing his undying love for me in between puking and taking more shots.
Just got back from the tanning beds. I'm a lobster. I fear for the safety of my nipples falling off.
walked into my roommates bathroom to her throwing up a quesadilla while singing come on skinny taco
Family trip though. I generally don't wheel too much ass with the fam in tow. Despite the fact my parents would be pleased if I did.
I just want to order a very large pizza and get very drunk and very laid.
I was just informed that I asked for a glass of wine at the police station
I'm sure it would have gone very well with the cigarette you lit there.
wish he had known he had poison ivy on his cock beforehand... Is calamine okay to put on your vag?..
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