question: masturbation: how much is too much? I think i'm about to tip toe a fine line
the last thing i remember is you screaming lets hunt humans.
How can people commit suicide when things like bagels exist
About to fuck some random fraternity guy I met at a party. I guess this would be the right time to say I don't want to be with you anymore.
Oh my god, I hid a wine bottle in my boot.
GOOD NIGHT DREAM OF ALCOHOL SNO CONES
I got pulled into the conversation by "she sleeps with everybody" then "she" involved sleeping with "cocks the size of a viva burrito"
I love that your nipples always taste like clean laundry.
margarita monday on the first day back? my gpa is telling me noo! but my heart is telling me goo! I am conflicted..
How much booze could a drunk brad chug when a drunk brad does chug booze?!?
All. The answer is always all
I'm beginning a new chapter of my life in which our fridge will always be stocked with jello shots. I'm excited to embark down this road to fruity, semi-solid alcoholism.
I love my cat. she doesnt judge when i stumble in my house drunk and pass out on my floor. my dog looks at me disappointed.
Either my apartment is haunted or I'm far more drunk than I thought
I'm going to draw something on my chest and I need to incorporate my nipples. Any ideas?
You shoulda seen me try and clean up custard from an eclair off the floor while trying to pretend to be sober for my mom. Fucking hilarious.
Randomize
