The karaoke bar doesnt have electric avenue. Ill just have to pick another song and sing the lyrics to electric avenue
She sang Bad Romance to me. Not really the answer I was looking for.
Next time i try to unbutton my R.A's shirt with my teeth, please stop me
No promises.
I fucked my boyfriend 15 minutes before my pap test. My gyno probably thinks I hate her.
Its officially tradition: I black out every year on michael jackson's death day..
All of my current injuries can be related back to sex.
so high i just made my own version of grilled cheese using toast and spray cheese
here comes the puke
Nothing good has ever or will ever come from 50 cent beers at the bowling alley..
When I come over I'm bringing "Socky" the Alcoholism Prevention puppet, today he is going to tell you boys about his FAVORITE word---its called "moderation"
She twisted her ankle and paid a homeless guy for a piggy back ride home from the bar.
Opened my purse to realize I have someone else's birth certificate. What happens to me in college?
No memories of receiving this. Or of getting home. Or of apparently developing a taste for marmalade, which I assume is yours because I have literally never eaten it before. It's all over the kitchen. And my phone. And in my hair. Oh god I wish I wasn't on the train to work. X And sorry about the kitchen x
I woke up on a navy base in a different time zone. I'm never leaving tallahassee again.
Executive order 941: BRING ME THE FINEST PANCAKES!
You have got to stop watching the West Wing before going out.
Fun fact: nipples work on touch screens. Tell your friends :)
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